Toph Speaks

Snappinin, my loves? Let’s get dirty, shall we? Today is a beautiful 70 degree day here in San Francisco, and I feel alive. It’s the kind day where you want to answer a question with, “Up your butt and around the corner.” Try it! When your boss comes up to you today and says, “Mary, where are your TPS reports?” You tell him, “I’m sorry, sir, but I could have sworn I put those up your butt and around the corner.” I think today should be 80’s day. There are some things that I miss, and what to bring back. First off, I’m putting Tetherball in the office. I was boss at Tetherball. When I feel totally awesome, I’ll scream out cowabunga! More importantly, I’m going to make sure everyone has a coodie shot today. Psych!

Paul in Kansas City, MO - Toph, where did The Old 97’s go?

– Up your butt and around the corner. SCORE! Actually, I’m not sure where they are. I know Rhett put out his solo album, The Instigator, but other than that I’m not sure. Let me check their site. Wow! Thanks for question. Here’s a quote from Rhett, written today, “Two last things: Who’s in a Dallas studio next week, laying down demos for their new album? Uh-huh. ” You can read more by clicking HERE. I can’t wait for the new CD. I’m a big Old 97’s fan. You should be too.

Jess in Philadelphia, Penn - Love the site Toph!!! :)~

– Yeah, it pretty much gives me boners, too.

Stacy in Tallahassee, FL - Hey Toph, what are you doing?

– Not much. I’m actually sitting here at work, doing an Ask Toph. I was also reading an article printed about my friend Beau. It’s pretty cool. I have smart friends. Check it out HERE, and make sure to use his site which can be found HERE. Other than that, I’m gearing up for the Mavs game tonight. Game 3 here in the Bay Area. We say Bay Area when we don’t want to admit something is in Oakland. See, I’m sorting this place out.

Brad in San Diego, CA - Seriously, how do you find time for all of this?

– Listen, Brad. I just make it happen. It’s all you can do, you know. I wake up every morning and look in the mirror. I says, “Toph, make shit happen.” Then, I go out and I make shit happen. Is it a curse or a blessing? It’s neither. It’s something I have accepted and continue to believe in. It started at a young age, too. I believe I was 5 when I first made it happen. Superman has his role, and I have mine. I just do a better job of it.

Tom in Fort Myers, FL - Toph, where do all these chicks come from in your blogs?

– Some of them I know, and some of them I borrow and give credit where it’s due. Just know, that I have or will sleep with them.

Erika in Chapel Hill, NC - So, the big day’s coming soon… nervous?

– Not all. I am pretty pumped about it. I’ve mastered everything I’ve ever touched, so this won’t be too hard. A lot of my readers think this marriage is a joke, or some publicity stunt, and I want to assure you it’s not. Come July The Toph will be married. I better be at least, I dropped a shit load on the honeymoon. Speaking of which, we’re going HERE. My little foreigner had no idea the level of awesome she was getting herself into. I expect wedding presents, too.

Ashley in Charlotte, NC - Hey, Toph!!! Why no American Idol review this week? What else can we expect from this?

– Sorry about that, Ash. I was actually at a conference this week, and couldn’t catch up. Besides, no one was voted off. I’ll be sure to be back with one next week.

You can expect a lot more. I just added a possible weekly, or bi-weekly music portion of the blog, that should make people happy. Other than that, same ol’ Toph. Oh, and be sure to check out my friend Bob’s new blog HERE. He’s going to get deep on your asses. Lastly if you don’t know already, download a feeder and subscribe to my blog. I recommend Vienna, it’s what I use, and it works great. When you download it, be sure to click that little guy in your url bar, and you’ll always be in the know.

Alright… back to work. GO MAVS!!!!